I can empathize. I felt like I was going to die on Wednesday night and I only ate one order of cheese curds and a few mini-donuts (lower than your average fairgoer). I made an effort to avoid fried foods and the only thing I could find was roasted corn.
With a hilarious ending!
I saw a lot of “redneck” emblazoned things for sale at the fair. Redneck belt buckles and lighters and beer coolers and tshirts. I can’t really recall Minnesotans being terribly comfortable with the term, since 60% are urban dwelling, but since redneck seems to have shifted more towards “country” than “racist”, it seems to be popping up more and more up north.
At the Fair Lyrics
by Garrison Keillor
Go to an old church dining hall
Scrambled eggs and ham and all
The Lutheran coffee you can tolerate
At the fair
Take the skyride over the trees
Smell the hot dogs and the cheese
Hear the barker’s liturgies
At the fair
City folks and old cowhands
Geezers and teenage romance
Horse patrol and country bands
At the fair
Corn dogs, hot dogs, take your pick
Chocolate covered bacon - ick
Tater tots on a stick
At the fair
I got to see this live. The commentary that went along with it was even more impressive.
Today was the last day of the fair...
But I’m not quite done! Just got back to Brooklyn, several more videos and photos to upload, stay tuned!
The DNR stocks a man-made pond with several varieties of fish found in Minnesotan lakes. Some are very little (minnows), some are really freakin’ big and scary (northerns, muskies). My first thought upon seeing this was, “Hm…how do they stop the bigger fish from eating all the little fish?” and a few minutes of watching them in motion answered this question: they don’t. Everything is just chowing down on everything else. It’s a total feeding frenzy with a bunch of little kids watching in awe - here’s a little live-action Planet Earth for you, you sticky fingered brat. Stop throwing nickels at a fish that probably weighs more than you.
So on Labor Day are you stuck with a few giant, survival of the fittest fish throwing down Battle Royale style? Do we get to eat the losers? I’d really love to know what happens to the fish after the State Fair…can one of you be my Minnesotan Holden Caufield?
All irony and sarcasm aside, I love this woman. She is a look into my way-forward me-in-the-future machine. A square dancing dress with horse print trim, cute-yet-very-sensible old lady shoes and a fanny pack? Look at her dancing up a fucking storm, looking all fresh and fly and coordinated right in front of the Education building at the State Fair. Quintessential Old Minnesotan Lady right there. This is pretty much the Erikka 2040 look I’m aiming to achieve.
“So how does this thing work?”
“Well, see, there’s a stick that attaches to this little guy, and when you move the stick he moves his golf club and hits the miniature ball towards the miniature putting green just right up there, but you actually need one person to move the stick and one person to hold the little guy down while you move the stick.”
“Right. And how is this less retarded than actual golf again?”
